when do eyes dry out?

vague update into the saga.

I have never felt more alone and sad than I do right now in my life. I have made so many mistakes up to this point. I keep telling myself that..you only live once..be happy and make the most of it. But, I don't want to hurt anyone and I don't want them to hurt me, either. At first, I liked the idea of feeling that pain again...knowing that I am alive. Now that it has been lingering for a couple of weeks now, I would rather it just go away. So, what do I do? Do I go back to the comfort that I once knew, knowing that he will never leave me? Or, do I move forward into the unknown? It is looking bleak at the moment. And, my fears are usually correct...it may never be the same again.

The human mind/body is an incredible thing.
Not even considering what my day holds tomorrow, I have been blankly staring at the TV, watching my normal idiotic shows...and my stomach started to hurt and my heart started to race. Where has all this anxiety come from?
Then, I realized that I have to run a group tomorrow by myself for the first time in 2 years. Not only do I have to run group, but the boys are incredibly high energy and inappropriate. I haven't even considered what I wanted to do. My body just reminded me of what I need to do.
Now, I am anxious. I hate feeling anxious. Especially 14 hours in advance.

New car, new job...can't make everything right.
I'm sad that in life you can't be completely honest with those around you. But, I suppose that's a safety risk.

I need validation that I am not a terrible person.

This place is like the new facebook for me. I don't mean that in some cool, hip way. I mean, I still can't figure it out.
My new fancy camera is collecting dust because I'm computer illiterate. It's an unfortunate thing. I need to brush up on my skills if I want to stay young forever.

Completely off subject, tonight at work I said the word "jankety" to my boss. He laughed at me and said he had never heard that word. So, I sent him a link to the urban dictionary's definition.
This email machine is full of such useful information!

is it ever enough?

I often wonder, will I ever be completely happy?
God, that sounds shitty.
I have so much. But, sometimes, it feels like too little.